There is no reason for living hell in your family house! In this case, your question, “Should I get a divorce checklist?” needs a resounding ‘YES!”
However, before you embark on any sensitive rollercoaster, before seeking the advice of a divorce attorney and making the ultimate decision, THINK AGAIN!
Do you REALLY need this?
Try marriage counseling first and think twice about child support or spousal support.
Try some form of factual separation or legal separation first.
Does Getting the Sex, Intimacy, and Relationship Back Really Take All That Much More Work?
Table of Contents
- Communication breakdown – There may be an ongoing lack of communication in your marriage. Maybe the conversation becomes more of a battle of opinions, or the only conversation you have is complaining about each other. And if you are battling it out in a conversation that is too heated, you may be headed towards a divorce.
- Infidelity – Even though you may think your spouse is paying too much attention to you, infidelity to your spouse is a sign that your marriage is in serious trouble. A third party is messing with your relationship. Maybe it’s an affair, or perhaps it’s an affair that you’ve invited in. You may want to get out of it.
- Rejection – It may be that you feel rejected and unloved or not loved at all. Maybe the pain and rejection are constant. Perhaps it’s ongoing, and you feel like you have no good things to offer your spouse or no way you can fix it. And if that’s the problem, you may want to get out of it.
- Lack of intimacy – Maybe your spouse doesn’t have sex with you. Or if you do not make love with your spouse according to your saying, maybe you do it in secret, or perhaps you do it together and are not open about it. You can also get intimate in a way that isn’t so honest. And if it’s not open, then you’re more vulnerable and open to another. And maybe if you’re not genuine, or it’s not honest, then you’re less safe, which can lead to a need to get out.
- Sexless – You’re probably wondering why do you have a sexless relationship. It could be the fault of your partner. Maybe it’s the fault of the husband or wife. Or the responsibility of both, and so, the need to get out is most evident.
- You may need some assistance – You may not be able to get the sex or intimacy back, and you may need some assistance in getting it back. Sex is not an easy thing to manage or to acquire. It’s not something that can be taken lightly. There are many complications and considerations and many more factors that have to be considered. In that case, you may also need some outside help.
- Adjust and determine your future – You may also need to change, adjust, and learn how to cope and live with another. If that’s the case, likely, you’re only making it harder for yourself. So you have to determine if it’s worth it to you to get the sex and intimacy back and whether you’re ready to go there and whether or not you can do it alone. Or whether you can manage the consequences.
- Who gets the house? A tough question, isn’t it?
- Who gets the children? An even tougher question, isn’t it?
An expert may give you more direction and help.
If you’re not ready to go there, it’s too late, and you’re stuck with what you’ve got right now.
If you’re prepared to go there, there’s no better way to make sure than to see an expert.
They can tell you how long you should try, how to go about it, how to approach your partner, and how to handle the ensuing fallout.
You need to evaluate your marriage.
You need to evaluate your relationship with yourself and in the absence of your spouse and figure out what’s best for you.
You need to work out the details and the circumstances that impact you and your partner.
It’s up to you to figure out how to make sure that you don’t end up in divorce court and you figure out how to do it.
If you can’t, then you may not want to go there.
If you can go there, then that means that you’re prepared to deal with all the fallout and the aftermath of your divorce.
You’re ready to embrace your divorce and grow up.
Most importantly, though, you need to figure out what you’re willing to give up and how you will handle your spouse’s expectations.
Figure out how you can change the dynamic and the relationship.
Figure out how to adjust and evolve. You may necessitate moving out of your home.
Figure out how to do it so that you can adapt and grow with the dynamics of your marriage.
This can get complicated.
If you’re not ready to figure out this, perhaps you want to postpone it to when you’re ready.
Ready for making love?
You’re ready for sex, intimacy, and relationship when you can do all three simultaneously.
You’re ready for sex, intimacy, and relationship when you’re in tune with all of these components, and you can act in concert to make them work.
Should I get a divorce checklist? Divorce Advice – First, Evaluate!
Maybe You Have No Reason to Stay Married!!!
If your spouse has committed infidelity, it might be utterly incomprehensible that you should stay in the marriage.
Sometimes, spouses stop communicating with one another over the mundane, trivial things that really don’t matter all that much.
This communication breakdown can be alarming since it can mean that there’s no communication going on between the two spouses.
Infidelity in a marriage is a real reason to think about divorce, but it isn’t the only reason.
Sometimes, you might have no real reason to stay married to someone.
For example, suppose your spouse has cheated on you multiple times.
In that case, it’s almost impossible to stay in the marriage, no matter how tempting it is.
The answer to your question, “should I get a divorce checklist?“ is definitely a resounding “Yes”!
You will always have a memory of infidelity.
Still, if you don’t talk to one another about it, it can erode the foundation of the marriage.
There might be some superficial reasons that you should stay married to someone, but if you don’t discuss what the other spouse is doing, there’s no real reason to stay together.
Infidelity is rarely the only reason that people split up.
Sometimes, there are many different causes that people decide to divorce.
If you are wondering if you should stay married, look at the number of people who have been divorced and still love their ex-spouses.
Think about the reasons that they have stopped loving their ex-spouses and remember those reasons.
Once you can remember those reasons, you can act on those reasons.
If you have been cheating on your spouse repeatedly, you should stop this act and ask your spouse for some sort of commitment that will contain the cheating.
This can be a pledge not to cheat again, not have another affair, cheat on your spouse, etc.
If you do this, you will have to work out an arrangement with your spouse that will be permanent.
If you aren’t committed to this arrangement, it might be hard to get back together.
If you are committed to this arrangement, it might be a good idea to give up on the relationship and try again with a different partner.
A stay married or get divorced quiz? Work on getting back together.
Once you have worked out your new arrangement with your spouse, you should work on getting back together.
Once you have done this, you should do whatever you can to get back together.
Once you are back together, you should spend time making the relationship stronger.
It can be a lot of work, and you don’t want to rush this.
If your spouse isn’t interested in it, you will not have any thin reason to continue with it.
If your spouse is interested in the relationship, you should do whatever it takes to make it work.
Once you are back together, you should give compliments to your spouse.
As you can see, the work should be done when you are back together.
When you are on the brink of divorce, don’t be desperate.
It would help if you also understood that there is a definite reason for that.
Also, remember that there are no guarantees in marriage.
As I just wrote, there is always going to be a reason why you’re in a divorce situation.
So, how should you deal with a divorce?
You may do something and wait for your spouse to come back.
This might be the most suitable choice if you want to stay together and to build a family.
You can give your spouse some space. As long as you don’t push, you should wait and see.
I mean, it’s not like you’re getting back together. If you are, you just want to anticipate for a bit longer.
Don’t go crazy in thinking that you can have around the person who was just leaving.
I hope that the above advice for a divorced person will help you and as you can see, there are no guarantees in marriage.
You can always work it out (in this case, you would be interested in reading about why do exes always come back and act as if nothing happened; click the link to open a new window in your browser).
This guidance will be helpful; I sincerely hope so!
What Are the Signs You Should Look For Before You Divorce? Divorce preparation checklist…
Let me start this larger paragraph with an excellent excerpt from an online article.
Sometimes, you really could find pieces of precious stones online if you look carefully for them.
Here is the fragment from an excellent article
“There can be countless reasons you’re wondering when to divorce: infidelity, finances, sexless marriage, or lack of intimacy. Or maybe you’ve grown apart. Deciding to end your marriage may very well be among the most significant decisions you will ever face in your life, and it will affect you for many years to come – especially if you have children. And while there’s no easy answer to the question, Should I get a divorce? There are sure signs of divorce and things to consider that may help you decide if you should stay married or when to leave a marriage.”
Sometimes, there is no hurry to get any divorce checklist sheet. Husband and wife get along fine.
If you are worried about your spouse’s relationship with you, be assured that the relationship is delicate.
Your spouse may be hiding a little anger or sadness from you because he or she is still processing the news.
The kids are in a neutral position.
Husband and wife no longer talk with open intent and have agreed to do just fine without the kids.
What’s on your divorce preparation checklist or, better said, on your ultimate divorce checklist?
Have you thought about spousal support, about child support, child custody, domestic violence, and family law?
Are you aware of the family’s financial information, insurance policies, bank account, credit report, and credit card details?
Are you considering divorce as your last way out, as your final thoughts on the problem, or you’re believing that getting divorced is child’s play?
A sexless marriage has severe implications for children. There is no sex life. Sex is vital to the bond between husband and wife.
Still, once that has become awkward or dysfunctional, the relationship can be too uncomfortable.
It could also be a symptom of something more sinister.
- No money for bills. You have been staying out late, partying less, or working longer hours. In most cases, this is a sign of money issues. If husband and wife cannot afford the bills, their marriage is likely in trouble.
- The kids are rebellious. The kids want to be independent and have a sense of self, and sometimes they will put your new relationship in jeopardy.
- All problems seem to be on husband or wife. Many times husband and wife will blame each other for the failures of the marriage.
- The sex life is no longer intense. Sex is vital to the bond between husband and wife, but if the sex life is no longer passionate, then the marriage is at risk.
Leaving your husband checklist… Have you double-checked all your motifs?
The children seem to want a dad and a mom (more on fighting for my marriage and tips on how to fight for marriage here; click the link). If the children are confused about their gender, there may be something else going on.
The kids seem to have forgotten about the divorce. They have forgotten that their parents were not happy all the time. They are happy now and have forgiven their parents.
The kids seem to have forgotten about the marriage. They have no idea that their parents were once in love.
The kids are acting out. It may be that the parents are not emotionally available. They may be behaving this way because of withdrawal symptoms from divorce. It could be they are trying to get the attention of the parent.
There are some signs that you should look out for. They could be a sign of a divorce gone wrong.
- When both parents start to ignore the child, one parent might begin to talk about his or her career, and the other parent will start to talk about his or her personal life.
- Suppose the child does not seem to want to talk to you anymore. It would be best if you started to get worried. If there is no reply when you call them, it could be that there is a separation going on.
- Suppose there is no more interest shown by both parents towards the child. This could be a sign of abuse or mental health problems.
Sift through these signs…
Look at the above three signs when you are managing your children after the divorce. If any of these three signs are present, then you should take a closer look at the marriage or even your parents’ divorce.
If you do not know about the signs above and are absent, you have no choice but to leave the marriage. This is because you might be in for some difficult times and problems.
If you are already married, it might be good to give it a second thought. You have to realize that your spouse is not your real-life soul mate. They are your husband or wife before marriage and after marriage. So what happens after divorce, and what can you do to handle the transition.
In the end, it is up to you to decide whether the divorce is good or bad for you. You should be realistic and look at the present situation. At times, you should just accept the reality and not blame yourself. You should be strong enough to face the future.
This way, you can look back and say that you have been brave enough to face the ordeal of divorce and the challenges of a divorce. It would help if you remembered that a divorce does not have to be a bad thing.
However, suppose you are unable to face the challenges of a divorce.
In that case, you should go for counseling or join a support group (if you prefer fighting over your marriage, read this article; click the link).
Frequently Asked Questions
It is okay to get a divorce after six months of marriage, provided both the parties are not doing good at that moment. In such circumstances, it is not okay to get a divorce even after six months of marriage.
Think about why you want to get married. What do you hope to get out of the relationship? Is it for companionship, an authentic expression of your love, or is it simply for the sake of “honor”? Be very mindful of your motives and be honest with yourself about what is being sought. This is extremely important.
If you want to avoid a divorce and save your marriage, you must commit to each other. Commitment is a must, whether you are married or newlyweds. Being committed to your partner is the essence of marriage. And your commitment is what makes your union the kind of marriage that lasts.
I think it’s safe to say that most men have some form of sexism in their lives. I find that many men go through the stages of denial as sexism shows up in their lives. I’ve noticed that some men go through denial about sexism as it shows up in their relationships, work, socializing, or even in their shopping habits.
Women face sexism in more than just a few cases. For example, women are often put on trial for their health, family, and career decisions. In divorce cases, women who get help from their ex-husbands in their careers are often put on trial. Both of these examples show just how pervasive sexism is. So pervasive that a man with the best intentions can unintentionally reinforce the idea that women are second-class citizens and not equals. Should you get a divorce checklist quickly? I really don’t know the answer. It’s up to you…
Maria
PS. Please, consider my words and advice as a personal opinion. I am no guru, and, unfortunately, I cannot guarantee happiness (in wealth or marriage or happiness, whatever situation; if you are thinking about serious consequences, please, see a lawyer; my advice or words or jokes or whatever couldn’t in any way replace a thorough qualified legal opinion; act very wisely, please).
Disclaimers. All rights reserved. I hope you have enjoyed reading my blog post, ’Should I Get A Divorce Checklist or Keep Living Like Hell?’. All photos were used from the “Captiva Collection,” Wedding, Pregnancy People (1), and Romance by David Watson (I’ve got the copyright). The featured image is from Pixabay, featured in Canva; a great thanks to everyone for their work! If you could give me a Twitter share, a Youtube, Instagram, or a Facebook share or other social media, it would help a lot! An affiliate disclosure is on the disclaimer page; I might make a small commission if you buy through my links at no price increase for you or anyone.
