To preserve your marriage should be your supreme goal. However, it is essential to be realistic in marriage. There’s not any relationship out there that’s absolute.
You see, we women (and men too) do not mature as adults do.
We mature as children do.
The fact is, men and women are different in how they grow and how they mentally develop.
We cannot grow and evolve like adults.
We can only do things like mimic adult behavior when it is convenient to do so. So instead of watching our husbands mature, we should be modeling our behavior on how they should mature.
Men mature when they find acceptance in a loving family where they are loved unconditionally.
Women mature when they find love in a loving relationship where they are respected.
If we wait for our husbands to realize our dreams and accept us for who we are, we will wait a long time.
We should be doing the hard work ourselves and then watching the changes in our husbands.
Marriage is a two-way street.
Table of Contents
The way we treat our husbands when they’re not progressing in their growth will determine how much progress they make. When we look at our husbands and see how they treat us, we will know their progress.
This blog post is not about to preserve marriage ministries as I firmly believe that, at home, the couples themselves should apply clever (not far-fetched or false) to preserve marriage plans.
I have recently read a troubling question. I have then thought quite a lot about this complicated problem of a young girl. Here is the question:
“What can you do as a daughter to help save your parents’ marriage My father ignores my mother all the time ever since she found out he was cheating She wants things to work between them but my father gives her the cold shoulder deliberately?”
It is really tough to find an answer. I believe that the best thing would be to reread this article as there are, I hope, numerous wise sentences and judgments in it. The understanding of these words would certainly help.
We must work together to achieve our dreams and desires. No one can do the work for us. Our husbands need to see that when we are not doing things to make their lives easier, they do something to make our lives easier.
If they comprehend that we work together, they will work in our interest instead of ours.
Men need to know that they have a wife who will be their cheerleader, ally, best friend, and confidante. We need to have female role models who can show them how a woman should behave.
In marriage, we want our spouse to be our best friend.
This is a lady-oriented marriage. We want our wives to be our best supporters.
When we are having problems, or in pain, or angry, our husband needs to be the one to talk to us, not the other way around.
This helps us stay together, and it helps him get his feelings out.
A woman should not act like the man is behaving.
She should know how to listen and give input on important decisions that affect her and the family. If the wife wants her husband to be more emotionally honest with her, she should tell him what she is feeling and thinking and let him do the same.
If she is hurting, she should let her husband know about it.
A woman should not always be the one who tells her husband that she is hurt. This hurts him and causes him to misbehave. He needs to hear it from her, not him, himself.
When the wife is hurting her husband, and the husband is not listening, it will hurt the marriage.
Marriage enrichment and marriage preservation.
In a marriage, when the wife is pushing her husband to be truthful with her, she shouldn’t feel like she’s on opposing sides. It should be a mutually beneficial thing for her to be honest with him.
When the wife is upset and the husband is not addressing her feelings, he should be taking steps to resolve it. Let him express it, and try to listen and calm her down. When he’s upset, he should be proactive and try to figure out how he’s causing her the upset.
When the wife is angry, and the husband is not trying to listen to her, she should be proactive about causing her husband emotional pain. She should be accepting that he’s hurt and try to be a good listener.
When the husband is showing signs of being emotionally honest with her, she should be acknowledging that he’s telling the truth and trying to calm him down.
This is beneficial for her and beneficial for the marriage. It’s also helpful for the husband because it shows him that his wife is a loyal ally.
A woman should show her husband how her words affect him and how her actions change his emotions.
The goal should be to make her husband want to be truthful with her and keep his desire to lie to her as a thing of the past.
Suppose the wife shows her husband how her words and actions affect the marriage, and the husband is not listening to her. In that case, he should see how her behavior hurts him and how it makes him want to lie to her. It is an important matter of how to preserve marriage.
By trying to figure out how she’s causing him emotional pain and how her words and actions affect the marriage, a wife helps her husband figure out what he’s missing. And she helps him put the pieces together so that they can be more honest with each other.
If the husband does this, he will be more open with his feelings. His wife will benefit from having him be honest with her and help her build up her relationship with her husband.
By helping the wife understand what the husband is missing and being honest with her, the wife will be helping her husband and building up her marriage.
Let the wife figure out how her actions and words are hurting her husband. Then she should try to be truthful with him and make him feel valued by her, and all the same, things the husband says should be treated as truth.
Frequently Asked Questions
No. They do not. I am sorry. As far as I know, I never heard of a long, sound marriage without a vibrant sexual life. They dissolve into affairs or divorce, usually.
In a bad relationship, the lack of communication can warn that your marriage is not working. If your spouse doesn’t seem to mind about this and seems downright indifferent about it, it might be time to take action. Sometimes, marriage loses its spark. Most marriages go through this phase once in a while. If you ignore it, your marriage is toast.
The first step is to take notice of your situation. Take a moment and take inventory of your relationship. What have you been doing that just brought your spouse down? Don’t be shy and say, “I don’t know,” be honest. Also, be kind enough to state your faults. If your spouse has something to say about something you have done, share what you have done, but don’t criticize your spouse. It is hard to get your spouse to open up about what he or she has done if the spouse is feeling defensive.
The next step is to accept your mistakes. For example, if you are not taking care of yourself, be willing to take action. Go to the gym, get a fresh haircut, get a new dress, get a manicure. Do something that you know will make you feel better about yourself. Also, if you wish to read another enticing blog post of mine (clicking this link), don’t be ashamed to say that you are sorry.
The third step is to forgive. Again, this is a gradual process. If there has been a mistake, forgive, but don’t make it look like you beg your spouse to let it go. You don’t want your spouse to think you are that desperate. Instead, offer some solution that will help your spouse. For example, “Can we work through this issue?”, “Can we meet sometime to talk about this issue?”, “Can we try to do something else that will help us both get our needs met by eliminating this one issue that is bothering us?”
This is when you have to try to bring back what used to make your marriage special. When I am talking about marriages, I am not talking about an unhappy marriage. I am talking about a marriage that is happy and filled with love and passion. For example, you should try to put a positive spin on things and make yourself appear as the picture of happiness. The words “I am sorry” should be the kiss of death for your marriage. I say this because you want to say it with a happy tone of voice, but your spouse will not believe you. You want to appear sincere, but your spouse will think you are just saying it to keep him or her from leaving you.
For more enticing information on this matter, read this article and this article; click the links as they will open new tabs in your pre-existing browser.
If you want to be cherished in your marriage, you have to be generous with your thanks and appreciation. It is a good habit to give a loving kiss or a hug in the morning before you leave for work. It is also a good habit to say “sorry” when you come back from work.
It is also a good habit to keep communication alive. You can make your spouse feel good if you talk about what you have done. You can say how happy you are to have shared a day with your spouse. It is also good if you keep your senses open. You can honor your spouse or say how sorry you are if you know that you have let him or her down. It makes your spouse feel good if you compliment them. You can also express your sadness when you see that you have not done things well.
If you want to have an immeasurable married life, you have to be generous with your thanks and appreciation. It does not mean that you have to give one thankful for a day done. It is also not true that you have to keep silent for the life of you. Good communication is a vital element in a harmonious married life. You can also help your spouse clean the house, cook, wash the clothes, do the laundry, etc.
You can also have a sound married life by not nagging your spouse or grumbling over little things.
Maria
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PS. Please, consider my ‘wise’ considerations cum grano salis. They are nothing else than personal opinions. I am no guru, and, unfortunately, I cannot, therefore, guarantee happiness (in wealth or marriage or couple relationship or happiness or mental health, whatever situation). If you are planning some severe consequences, see a lawyer, please; my advice or words or jokes or whatever couldn’t in any way or form replace a thorough qualified legal opinion; act very wisely, please.
I hope you have greatly enjoyed reading my blog post,’ How To Preserve Marriage | Making Your Relationship Work.’ The images are from the “Captiva Collection,” Wedding, Pregnancy People (1), and Romance by David Watson; the Instagram image is from the volume ‘Quotes ‘by the same author (I’ve got the copyright). All rights reserved.
